How to empower and raise confident young men and women

We all have days where we doubt ourselves – our abilities, our worth, our appearance or our relationships. For most of us, these are passing moments and we are able to give our heads a shake, remind ourselves of our strengths and move on. However, for many people – especially teenagers – these doubts can be debilitating and affect their daily functioning. They can contribute to and underlie mental health disorders such as anxiety and depression. While low self-esteem in and of itself is not considered a mental disorder, its negative effects can be so widespread that it might as well be one.

In today’s digital age with the widespread use of social media, we are seeing more teens struggle with their self-esteem than ever before. While many are looking to social media for validation in the form of “likes” on their photos and “friend requests,” doing so can have the complete opposite effect. They compare themselves to “curated” images and other teens’ “perfect lives” and inevitably end up falling short. Spending so much time online rather than in face-to-face interactions also increases loneliness and social isolation, which in turn lowers self-esteem.

As parents, we want to be role models for our children. Sometimes this is easier said than done! How can we raise confident young men and women? Here are some suggestions:

  1. Model disconnecting from your phone, getting out and doing things! Especially now that the weather is improving, it is easier to get outside and be active. Physical activity is not only good for your body but also your mind.
  2. Show your teens that even when you have set backs (either personal or professional), you are able to learn from them and move forward.
  3. Remind them that what they see online is not “what they get.” Reinforce the fact that many people only post their “best selves” online and not their reality (insecurities, bad days, relationship difficulties etc.)
  4. Be a cheerleader for your teen! Reinforce their strengths, remind them that no one is perfect and help them learn from their experiences ☺

Alter, Stuckler & Associates are a team of registered psychologists and a social worker that provide compassionate psychological care. We have provided service to individuals, couples and families from Thornhill, Markham, Vaughan and throughout the Greater Toronto Area for more than 30 years. Have a question for our team? Contact us today.